Browse Month

January 2012

Google thinks it’s the new God. I now go to Google Church.

OK, the NymWars are getting hot! Google has power, but people have more power: Their words and loyalty say they want their god d*amned psuedonyms. Some of us benefit from pseudonyms and the Internet practically runs on them. They’re the heart and soul of every conversation/tweet/update/friend request/plentyoffish/grindr hookup/etc. “Real Names” only, Google said. But… now they have a new policy of letting *some* users, like celebrities and (get ready for me now…) Pseudo-Celebrities 🙂 use ’em. Did you see how I did that?! I’m d*mn f*cking funny!
Anyway, I will personally update you on MY OWN appeal with the search giant, as they have removed my psuedonym from my 8 year old Google account and replaced it with “(first name)”VocalVirgo” (last name)”.”. I kid you not- my last name is a period. And I feel the flow already. But I am a Google Wh*re. Honestly, if they made a Chromebook with a bigger f*cking Hard Drive, I’d be all over that sh*t, and I’d stick my 2 biggest fingers (my thumbs) up Apple’s *ss (just because it’d be fun).

 (google hurter my feeling… just the one)

(aaaaand now they hurt the other one. it was all i had left)

Poor Peta Person :(

Now listen, I get activism, I get standing up for your cause TOTALLY. I get it. I do it! A Peta person standing up against bikers wearing leather is admirable, considering the other option is to throw paint on some fur-wearing bimbo in Beverly Hills. However, being outnumbered by even a team of bimbos is better than a small clan of bikers. Bimbos aren’t smart enough to snatch you and your animal-loving friends up, keep you, fart on you, pee on you, make you eat meat, and then tape you to a tree days later. Yeah, seriously….. If I’ve learned anything from dating a crazy person it’s this: Pick your Cause wisely, and pick your Battles wiselyer. 🙂
I feel bad for the guy.

(1 person wast harmed, humiliated, and even pee’d on during the process of this photo, and he’s the one hanging right there. the only silver lining here is… er… well- the duct tape!)

I feel compelled to be serious…

So, I promise to stick to my usual schtick, but my next Vlog is going to be about something semi-serious. I was semi-serious about my fetish on the last video, which is real (but funny) and I actually felt better after having “come out of the closet” about it. So, I decided I will do another Vlog where I get to gripe/review/piss all over something I am semi-pasionate about. You nosey f*ckers will find out what it is when the Vlog posts. Yeah, I said it like that.
Also, I got a few suggestions on topics to talk about. And no, “iLikeitInmy*ss” (his version has no asterisk), I will not do a 3 minute thing on cleaning the “butt-hole” for better sex. Topics are SEMI-SERIOUS. Chitchat about butt-hole sex is not serious enough. Unless we do a how-to video. Hmmm. That gives me an idea….