@drewbarrymore flirted with me once in Los Angeles in the gym parking lot. I denied her, (and I assume she cried all the way home) and I felt fine about it. Besides, she probably wanted a ride on my bike and I have a strict policy of “NO GIRLS ALLOWED!” Well, it seems like I made right choice. I heard she bit the fingers off some guy and then proceeded to eat him. WTF?? I could have been that guy. (God knows what she would have bitten off). So Drew: No means NO. And it’s staying no, you people-eater! #SantaClaritaDiet
@Twitter has become a place for people to bash each other. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing, but geez, doesn’t @realDonaldTrump have a new job now that requires his TIME and ATTENTION? Why is this f*cker on Twitter fighting like a schoolgirl with anybody who disagrees with his “policy”. I mean, His policy is to treat women, any brown or dark brown persons, the gays, and as stated above, anyone who disagrees with him, no matter who or what they are- like crap.
If he is going to pull a #MuslimBan on our fellow humans, can’t we put a #TwitterBan on him?
Hey! You! Trump! You’re a 70 year old man who somehow became the President of the United States. Why don’t you put down your Moto X and stop Tweeting #Hate and your own brand of #Negativity and just try to pretend to do your job and f*ck up this country…?
He is right about one thing. His Daughter is HOT. I wanna grab her by the p*ssy. #GrabEmByThePussy Wait… which daughter was it?
Well, when my 7 month old iPhone SE started having sound output problems and kept doing so after a rest, @Apple was awesome to hand me a brand new one. And this is why I love Apple.
Asking Siri where the nearest drycleaners is to me was like asking a Bull-Dyke for a bl*wjob. It only found half of them that were in my area, and refused to tell me where the one was that was right around the corner. I had to call a friend that’s in this town to ask where it was. @Apple: You owe my friend a blowjob. And FYI: I’m about 2 clicks away from giving away this iPhone and my slower than God on Sundays brand new Mac and getting a Pixel phone and a Chromebook. #Suck.My.D*ck.