Last night I f*cked in the *ss. Several times. Strange thing is, he was calling out for that dumb b*tch wh*re he does those funny videos with. I don’t know why he’d call for her…. she looks like the type to join in, not help him out of a situation. Did I mention she’s a wh*re?
I wasn’t going to mention this, because you all know how shy I am… but I had me some sex last night. It was a wild time. I’m going to ask her to come back over tonight. @Rosie was the second best lay I ever had. @realDonaldTrump was better, but only because he was willing to do some crazy sh*t, @Rosie is too much of a lady. And she has way nicer hair. And I’m sad to say, @realDonaldTrump has carpeting that does indeed match the drapes, and that made it pretty difficult to do the oral.
How could I forget to link to this video? It has sh*t AND children!!
I made the most yummiest cheese ravioli and cause last night and I am paying for it today with heavy farting. Surprisingly there is no odor accompanying what sounds like the horn section of a Hollywood Bowl show. And don’t get me started on how much louder my farts are when my *ss is shaved. Then it sounds like tubas- all tubas in the horn section, folks.